Phoenix
Nine Heavens~
She was a sight for sore eyes. As Cheng Yu came into Lian Song’s sight, his heart skipped a beat.
Their history together was bittersweet. Tens of thousands of years ago, their passionate romance ended abruptly. Lian Song’s father, the previous Sky Lord, deemed Cheng Yu unworthy of becoming his princess consort. This decision left Lian Song heartbroken and single. Despite his womanizing facade, Lian Song still held onto lingering affections for her.
“Cheng Yu!” he called out to her.
Today she was dressed as a female. As Cheng Yu stood before him now, her arms crossed, leaning into her right leg and her posture exuding confidence, Prince Lian Song walked to her, feeling some of the stress from the past few days lifting.
“Cheng Yu, where have you been?” he asked cheerfully, unable to contain his delight. His smile widened, revealing his charming dimples.
Cheng Yu, however, responded with an expression of annoyance to see him, her palm finding its way to her face in exasperation. She tried to sidestep Lian Song, wanting to avoid any unnecessary confrontation with him. But he stood firm, blocking her path.
Something about her aura seemed different, and Lian Song couldn’t help but be intrigued. Moving back in three long strides, he studied her appearance from head to toe. His guess was correct. She had ascended to high immortal.
Her interests were in everything but ascension. She preferred to spend her time visiting the sugar cane fields in the eastern wilderness, engaging in gossip, making love matches for others, and consuming fermented fruits. In all the time he had known her, she had made no efforts to cultivate herself because she was indifferent to status, but she had ascended.
He quickly unfurled his fan with a single snap, his white hair ties dancing as he scrutinized her every detail. “When did this happen? There’s nothing more lovely than a new elevated aura. It’s so shiny.” He said. Continuing to circle her, he took in the sight of her impressive, immortal aura.
“I’ve just come back from my tribulation, a love trial.” She replied. Her smirk transformed into a satisfied, radiant smile as she showed off her newfound cultivation.
Lian Song’s eyes suddenly flew wide open. “Really? Your trial coincided with Ye Hua’s. What a strange coincidence. It would have been fascinating if you saw or met Ye Hua and Bai Qian during your trial, but the odds of that happening would be extremely slim…”
His speech stumbled as she quickly nodded that she had.
In a petulant manner, she proclaimed. “I did. I saw the Skylord and Gugu. High God Mo Yuan as well.”
Lian Song’s face paled as he nervously stuttered out, “Wha..what.. What? You saw them?”
“Mhmm,” she replied before walking away, with him trailing closely behind. Despite his hesitation, Lian Song was very curious to know. “How are things progressing along? Who is married to whom? By chance, are any of them dying soon? The twin princesses need them to return.”
Spinning around, Cheng Yu walked ahead, making Lian Song step back, saying, “Dying? No. High God Mo Yuan and the Sky Lord are only twenty-six, and Gugu is even younger and pregnant. She’s High God Mo Yuan’s empress.”
Lian Song’s legs almost buckled under him. “Oh, no! My poor Ye Hua. This is a catastrophe! How is it that he is not married to Bai Qian? What a shame he is a bachelor in this trial!? This might end badly for Ye Hua.”
Lian Song lamented, but Cheng Yu replied, “Skylord Ye Hua isn’t a bachelor. He has had two wives. Gugu was one, and I was the other. We even consummated, meaning I saw the Skylord without his clothes.” She smirked and gave Lian Song a suggestive eyebrow wag.
“WHAT!? You and Ye Hua did WHAT!?” He shouted. Lian Song stumbled when his legs actually failed him. “Wait, your love trial was with Ye Hua?! How passionate was your love trial!? TELL ME! HOW MANY TIMES!? WAS IT GOOD?! NO! DON’T TELL ME! NO, TELL ME EVERYTHING!! CHENG YU! TELL ME!”
==========
Jinghua~
A-li’s blindness is a secret at the moment, known only to our immediate family members. I don’t know the full extent of what happened. The Empress Dowager, who has treasured A-li most since the day she was born, said Jingyuan must have had a momentary lapse of insanity.
Royal mother declared the concubine was the kind of woman who is an insult to A-li because of her ordinary looks and personality, since she didn’t go through selection like the others.
Since the passing of her father, imperial physician Wan, she had been cherished and raised by A-li, who spoiled her like a meimei. The young woman had only seen Jingyuan in passing since entering the harem and had led A-li to believe she had no interest in staying in the harem or becoming one of the emperor’s women.
However, A-li arranged for the female to spend time with Jingyuan, and she crawled her way into his bed on a night when A-li was expecting him to be with her. This and the sudden timing of A-li’s blindness made the deceitful girl more despicable in the royal mother’s eyes.
The Empress Dowager said.”I told Empress the girl was trouble and only using her to get closer to Jingyuan. I saw it in her eyes. Cunning and deceit, but you know A-li. Her actions reflect her intentions, so she thinks others are like her.”
“I grounded that fork-tongued seductress, but she still wandered into the empress’s palace and repeated Jingyuan’s pillow talk in front of A-li with servants present. She even slandered Jingyuan by asking if he caused her abortion to appease A-li.”
“As if A-li would ever consider such a thing. She genuinely cherishes all the imperial offspring, so I did it.”
“I did it for the harem. How can A-li forgive Jingyuan if she has to stare at the reminder of her profound disappointment in her husband? That concubine is fortunate I’m not running the harem anymore. I would have done much worse to her than a few slaps and the simple task of copying books.”
“Our A-li is too generous and forgiving for her own good.”
Empress Dowager, my mother, was highly opinionated and had more to share on the topic, yet Jingyuan has said nothing about what happened between them, and I haven’t pried. I understand that it is a private and sensitive matter between husband and wife, and I know the lines I shouldn’t cross. Sometimes, some questions are best left unasked. However, I can say emphatically that Jingyuan is a changed man, and not in a good way, and I have some insight into what he’s going through.
Despite it being late spring, his life has become cold because… A-li’s love is like no other, and I know firsthand.
It begins with a sweetness that dances in your mind as she takes over all your thoughts, teasing and playful, then her spark ignites the ember nestled in your heart that seems to have been waiting for her. As her love for you deepens, her affections envelop you like a warm embrace, seeping into every fiber of your being. Her kisses are nirvana, her body taking you to new heights of pleasure repeatedly, and she becomes like the air you breathe, necessary.
So one could say she loves as fiercely as she hates, both emotions consuming her in equal measure. There is no room for anything in between, no shades of gray to soften her mindset and heart. It’s a dichotomy of black and white, like a stark painting devoid of subtlety, and her rejection isn’t a gentle brush-off that one can easily ignore. It’s a violent tearing away, ruthless and cruel.
The loneliness he feels from missing her must be deafening, like being trapped in a soundproof room where all he can hear is the echo of his own heartbeat. He is going through a sensory deprivation that leaves him yearning for her touch, her warmth, and the sound of her voice and laughter.
Jingyuan is suffocating and struggling to breathe because she has become, like air, necessary.
======
Colorful and fragrant flowers bloom in abundance in the flowerpots scattered around her tranquil courtyard. The sound of songbirds chirping in their cages drifts pleasantly through the peaceful air.
Rocking back and forth in her chair, she runs her slender fingers along the smooth wooden armrests. Despite her eyes being covered by a blindfold, she tilts her head towards the sun’s comforting touch, looking contented as the mild spring heat softly kisses her skin, making her cheeks rosy and flushed.
The material covering her eyes is as white as snow. Draped in a loose and flowing white gown, its hanging, bell-sweeping sleeves moving languidly from her subtle rocking motion. In her mourning for Min Qian Ju, she adorns herself with modest simplicity, forgoing all jewelry. Her silver white hair, meticulously arranged into a simple bun, holds a single white flower.
This sight of her is both absolutely breathtaking and thoroughly heartbreaking.
“Hmm. You’re coming in through the front gate like a proper prince? What’s the occasion?” She speaks informally, sounding as if she’s talking to herself. Even though I move lightly, she turns her head towards me, sniffing the air and smiling tenderly. “You need a new hebao. That one’s fragrance doesn’t suit you.”
Upon entering the courtyard, her servants notice me and greet me with a ceremonial bow. As I sit facing her in a beautifully handcrafted wooden rocking chair made by my great-great-uncle, I sense a soft, fragrant breeze on my face while the chair gently rocks beneath me until my feet stabilize it.
I remind myself to smile because I know she’ll hear it in my voice. “You’re being overly critical. It’s not that terrible.” I reply.
She answers in a sassy manner. “Yes, it is. The cinnabar makes you smell like a cheap whore. I would offer to make you a new one, but my stitching isn’t the best these days.”
“Don’t make excuses. Your stitching wasn’t that great when you could see,” I tease her.
She smirks at my response. “Cousin,” She greets me informally, pressing the soles of her feet to the ground, pushing off lightly to create a gentle rocking motion, and resting her hands on her pregnant stomach.
When the breeze carries another wave from my fragrance pouch to her nose, she crinkles it and exclaims, “Yuck.” Then she suggests. “Perhaps you should find a new lover who can make you a fragrance pouch and fill it with her affections.”
I fill her half-empty teacup, then mine, while chuckling at her. When the hot liquid is poured, the tinkling sounds echo softly like a melody.
“I have a lover,” I tell her, and her pouty mouth curves into an impish smile. She lifts her eyebrows at me, intrigued, waiting for me to continue. I don’t keep her waiting.
I confess in my most convincing voice, “My long-time lover is Miss Palm and her five sisters. I love them because they are always ready for me and say very little. In fact, they don’t speak at all, and they never expect presents. I don’t need to remember their birthdays. It works for me.”
“Satisfaction through self-pleasure has its limits.” She giggles with girlish laughter and shakes her head at me. It’s nice to see her smile. It’s good to hear her laughing. The sound was infectious, tickling my senses. “You’re ridiculous,” She pauses, reaching for her teacup. She swats my hand away when I try to help her. She hasn’t lost her independent streak.
The delicate porcelain teacup brushes and presses against her lips. She takes a small sip as the subtle aroma of jasmine fills the air. With a gentle clink, she places the teacup back on the table, and its position precisely aligns with the previous impression.
“But seriously, Jinghua,” her voice mingling with a soft sigh, “why are you here? The emperor might not look lightly on or approve of you entering the inner palace.”
I reply. “I have Jingyuan’s permission to visit you today, since he’s too busy to play chess with me. He’s dealing with Left Prime Minister Shao, who has submitted the most audacious petition for his daughter. Jingyuan is furious and tearing him a new orifice. I’ve never seen him so angry before. I think Lord Shao will be getting demoted soon.”
I pop a little hazelnut pastry into my mouth, chasing it down with a sip of tea, and turn the conversation, addressing my genuine concerns about her. “A-li, are you okay? I heard things got really chaotic yesterday. Shouldn’t you be resting in bed instead of sitting outside? Especially after bleeding?”
She snickers. “I didn’t bleed,” she confessed, brushing at her blindfold out of habit. She grimaces and contorts her body in the manner of someone who is stiff and achy, then gestures to a female servant standing a short distance away.
Phoenix
Nine Heavens~
She was a sight for sore eyes. As Cheng Yu came into Lian Song’s sight, his heart skipped a beat.
Their history together was bittersweet. Tens of thousands of years ago, their passionate romance ended abruptly. Lian Song’s father, the previous Sky Lord, deemed Cheng Yu unworthy of becoming his princess consort. This decision left Lian Song heartbroken and single. Despite his womanizing facade, Lian Song still held onto lingering affections for her.
“Cheng Yu!” he called out to her.
Today, she was dressed as a female. As Cheng Yu stood before him now, her arms crossed, leaning into her right leg and her posture exuding confidence, Prince Lian Song walked to her, feeling some of the stress from the past few days lifting.
“Cheng Yu, where have you been?” he asked cheerfully, unable to contain his delight. His smile widened, revealing his charming dimples.
Cheng Yu, however, responded with an expression of annoyance to see him, her palm finding its way to her face in exasperation. She tried to sidestep Lian Song, wanting to avoid any unnecessary confrontation with him. But he stood firm, blocking her path.
Something about her aura seemed different, and Lian Song couldn’t help but be intrigued. Moving back in three long strides, he studied her appearance from head to toe. His guess was correct. She had ascended to high immortal.
Her interests were in everything but ascension. She preferred to spend her time visiting the sugar cane fields in the eastern wilderness, engaging in gossip, making love matches for others, and consuming fermented fruits. In all the time he had known her, she had made no efforts to cultivate herself because she was indifferent to status, but she had ascended.
He quickly unfurled his fan with a single snap, his white hair ties dancing as he scrutinized her every detail. “When did this happen? There’s nothing more lovely than a new elevated aura. It’s so shiny.” He said. Continuing to circle her, he took in the sight of her impressive, immortal aura.
“I’ve just come back from my tribulation, a love trial.” She replied. Her smirk transformed into a satisfied, radiant smile as she showed off her newfound cultivation.
Lian Song’s eyes suddenly flew wide open. “Really? Your trial coincided with Ye Hua’s. What a strange coincidence. It would have been fascinating if you saw or met Ye Hua and Bai Qian during your trial, but the odds of that happening would be extremely slim…”
His speech stumbled as she quickly nodded that she had.
In a petulant manner, she proclaimed. “I did. I saw the Skylord and Gugu. High God Mo Yuan as well.”
Lian Song’s face paled as he nervously stuttered out, “Wha..what.. What? You saw them?”
“Mhmm,” she replied before walking away, with him trailing closely behind. Despite his hesitation, Lian Song was very curious to know. “How are things progressing along? Who is married to whom? By chance, are any of them dying soon? The twin princesses need them to return.”
Spinning around, Cheng Yu walked ahead, making Lian Song step back, saying, “Dying? No. High God Mo Yuan and the Sky Lord are only twenty-six, and Gugu is even younger and pregnant. She’s High God Mo Yuan’s empress.”
Lian Song’s legs almost buckled under him. “Oh, no! My poor Ye Hua. This is a catastrophe! How is it that he is not married to Bai Qian? What a shame he is a bachelor in this trial!? This might end badly for Ye Hua.”
Lian Song lamented, but Cheng Yu replied, “Skylord Ye Hua isn’t a bachelor. He has had two wives. Gugu was one, and I was the other. We even consummated, meaning I saw the Skylord without his clothes.” She smirked and gave Lian Song a suggestive eyebrow wag.
“WHAT!? You and Ye Hua did WHAT!?” He shouted. Lian Song stumbled when his legs actually failed him. “Wait, your love trial was with Ye Hua?! How passionate was your love trial!? TELL ME! HOW MANY TIMES!? WAS IT GOOD?! NO! DON’T TELL ME! NO, TELL ME EVERYTHING!! CHENG YU! TELL ME!”
==========
Jinghua~
A-li’s blindness is a secret at the moment, known only to our immediate family members. I don’t know the full extent of what happened. The Empress Dowager, who has treasured A-li most since the day she was born, said Jingyuan must have had a momentary lapse of insanity.
Royal mother declared the concubine was the kind of woman who is an insult to A-li because of her ordinary looks and personality, since she didn’t go through selection like the others.
Since the passing of her father, imperial physician Wan, she had been cherished and raised by A-li, who spoiled her like a meimei. The young woman had only seen Jingyuan in passing since entering the harem and had led A-li to believe she had no interest in staying in the harem or becoming one of the emperor’s women.
However, A-li arranged for the female to spend time with Jingyuan, and she crawled her way into his bed on a night when A-li was expecting him to be with her. This and the sudden timing of A-li’s blindness made the deceitful girl more despicable in the royal mother’s eyes.
The Empress Dowager said.”I told Empress the girl was trouble and only using her to get closer to Jingyuan. I saw it in her eyes. Cunning and deceit, but you know A-li. Her actions reflect her intentions, so she thinks others are like her.”
“I grounded that fork-tongued seductress, but she still wandered into the empress’s palace and repeated Jingyuan’s pillow talk in front of A-li with servants present. She even slandered Jingyuan by asking if he caused her abortion to appease A-li.”
“As if A-li would ever consider such a thing. She genuinely cherishes all the imperial offspring, so I did it.”
“I did it for the harem. How can A-li forgive Jingyuan if she has to stare at the reminder of her profound disappointment in her husband? That concubine is fortunate I’m not running the harem anymore. I would have done much worse to her than a few slaps and the simple task of copying books.”
“Our A-li is too generous and forgiving for her own good.”
Empress Dowager, my mother, was highly opinionated and had more to share on the topic, yet Jingyuan has said nothing about what happened between them, and I haven’t pried. I understand that it is a private and sensitive matter between husband and wife, and I know the lines I shouldn’t cross. Sometimes, some questions are best left unasked. However, I can say emphatically that Jingyuan is a changed man, and not in a good way, and I have some insight into what he’s going through.
Despite it being late spring, his life has become cold because… A-li’s love is like no other, and I know firsthand.
It begins with a sweetness that dances in your mind as she takes over all your thoughts, teasing and playful, then her spark ignites the ember nestled in your heart that seems to have been waiting for her. As her love for you deepens, her affections envelop you like a warm embrace, seeping into every fiber of your being. Her kisses are nirvana, her body taking you to new heights of pleasure repeatedly, and she becomes like the air you breathe, necessary.
So one could say she loves as fiercely as she hates, both emotions consuming her in equal measure. There is no room for anything in between, no shades of gray to soften her mindset and heart. It’s a dichotomy of black and white, like a stark painting devoid of subtlety, and her rejection isn’t a gentle brush-off that one can easily ignore. It’s a violent tearing away, ruthless and cruel.
The loneliness he feels from missing her must be deafening, like being trapped in a soundproof room where all he can hear is the echo of his own heartbeat. He is going through a sensory deprivation that leaves him yearning for her touch, her warmth, and the sound of her voice and laughter.
Jingyuan is suffocating and struggling to breathe because she has become, like air, necessary.
======
Colorful and fragrant flowers bloom in abundance in the flowerpots scattered around her tranquil courtyard. The sound of songbirds chirping in their cages drifts pleasantly through the peaceful air.
Rocking back and forth in her chair, she runs her slender fingers along the smooth wooden armrests. Despite her eyes being covered by a blindfold, she tilts her head towards the sun’s comforting touch, looking contented as the mild spring heat softly kisses her skin, making her cheeks rosy and flushed.
The material covering her eyes is as white as snow. Draped in a loose and flowing white gown, its hanging, bell-sweeping sleeves moving languidly from her subtle rocking motion. In her mourning for Min Qian Ju, she adorns herself with modest simplicity, forgoing all jewelry. Her silver white hair, meticulously arranged into a simple bun, holds a single white flower.
This sight of her is both absolutely breathtaking and thoroughly heartbreaking.
“Hmm. You’re coming in through the front gate like a proper prince? What’s the occasion?” She speaks informally, sounding as if she’s talking to herself. Even though I move lightly, she turns her head towards me, sniffing the air and smiling tenderly. “You need a new hebao. That one’s fragrance doesn’t suit you.”
Upon entering the courtyard, her servants notice me and greet me with a ceremonial bow. As I sit facing her in a beautifully handcrafted wooden rocking chair made by my great-great-uncle, I sense a soft, fragrant breeze on my face while the chair gently rocks beneath me until my feet stabilize it.
I remind myself to smile because I know she’ll hear it in my voice. “You’re being overly critical. It’s not that terrible.” I reply.
She answers in a sassy manner. “Yes, it is. The cinnabar makes you smell like a cheap whore. I would offer to make you a new one, but my stitching isn’t the best these days.”
“Don’t make excuses. Your stitching wasn’t that great when you could see,” I tease her.
She smirks at my response. “Cousin,” She greets me informally, pressing the soles of her feet to the ground, pushing off lightly to create a gentle rocking motion, and resting her hands on her pregnant stomach.
When the breeze carries another wave from my fragrance pouch to her nose, she crinkles it and exclaims, “Yuck.” Then she suggests. “Perhaps you should find a new lover who can make you a fragrance pouch and fill it with her affections.”
I fill her half-empty teacup, then mine, while chuckling at her. When the hot liquid is poured, the tinkling sounds echo softly like a melody.
“I have a lover,” I tell her, and her pouty mouth curves into an impish smile. She lifts her eyebrows at me, intrigued, waiting for me to continue. I don’t keep her waiting.
I confess in my most convincing voice, “My long-time lover is Miss Palm and her five sisters. I love them because they are always ready for me and say very little. In fact, they don’t speak at all, and they never expect presents. I don’t need to remember their birthdays. It works for me.”
“Satisfaction through self-pleasure has its limits.” She giggles with girlish laughter and shakes her head at me. It’s nice to see her smile. It’s good to hear her laughing. The sound was infectious, tickling my senses. “You’re ridiculous,” She pauses, reaching for her teacup. She swats my hand away when I try to help her. She hasn’t lost her independent streak.
The delicate porcelain teacup brushes and presses against her lips. She takes a small sip as the subtle aroma of jasmine fills the air. With a gentle clink, she places the teacup back on the table, and its position precisely aligns with the previous impression.
“But seriously, Jinghua,” her voice mingling with a soft sigh, “why are you here? The emperor might not look lightly on or approve of you entering the inner palace.”
I reply. “I have Jingyuan’s permission to visit you today, since he’s too busy to play chess with me. He’s dealing with Left Prime Minister Shao, who has submitted the most audacious petition for his daughter. Jingyuan is furious and tearing him a new orifice. I’ve never seen him so angry before. I think Lord Shao will be getting demoted soon.”
I pop a little hazelnut pastry into my mouth, chasing it down with a sip of tea, and turn the conversation, addressing my genuine concerns about her. “A-li, are you okay? I heard things got really chaotic yesterday. Shouldn’t you be resting in bed instead of sitting outside? Especially after bleeding?”
She snickers. “I didn’t bleed,” she confessed, brushing at her blindfold out of habit. She grimaces and contorts her body in the manner of someone who is stiff and achy, then gestures to a female servant standing a short distance away.
She is new. I am unfamiliar with the attendant, who takes her hands and carefully pulls A-li’s to her feet. Their movements are practiced when the servant stands on A-li’s right as I stand beside her on the left. A-li’s right hand holds onto the girl’s forearm to lead her.
Being the emperor’s woman, A-li should not be touched by any other man, not even me, despite our relationship.
She stretches and lets out a long groan that turns into a lung-emptying exhale. She takes careful, small steps forward and says, “Jinghua, stroll with me momentarily.”
Following that, almost as though she can sense my thoughts, she presents the servant beside her, stating, “Oh, this is Jia’er. She’s deaf, so we can speak freely, but isn’t it absolutely hilarious? The deaf leading the blind?”
As we aimlessly walk, she explains that Little Min informed the imperial physician about finding blood in her bed, which was true. “However, Little Min didn’t mention whether it was mine or from another.”
I abruptly burst into laughter and gulped in response. “Yes, harem intrigue. Well played, A-li. What about the lilac daphne flower bud, YuanHua, in your bird’s nest soup?”
“There was indeed lilac daphne flower bud extract YuanHua in the soup, but I didn’t drink any of it,” She points out. “Jinghua, sometimes it is unnecessary for things to be explicitly stated and done. The mere suggestion alone can create assumptions that can lead to intrigue and suspicion.”
“But now.” She gasps. I notice her breathing is harder, labored from her pregnancy. “I’ve poked the wasp’s nest that is Noble Consort Shao. She’s been grounded to stay in her quarters, but she hasn’t been demoted.”
She shuffles gradually in her courtyard. I feel sorry for her being confined. It’s like an unbroken pony being led in circles. She must be reading my mind because she says she feels like her mare, Fie Yun. Fie Yun is also pregnant by Jingyuan’s stallion. “I don’t remember being this big the first time, and I can’t sleep lately. I’m restless all night, even though I’m drained. Maybe it’s the weather. I don’t know what to do.”
“A-li, I can’t believe this is coming out of my mouth, but sex and an orgasm will put you right to sleep. You’ll be snoring all night.” I suggest, half serious and half in jest.
She presses her lips together and wrinkles her nose. Her voice becomes husky. “I can’t bring myself to come between true love soul mates. Concubine Wan is the one for the emperor.”
“A-li, she has not served Jingyuan since that night. She is not his soul mate,” I tell her, then with sensitivity because I know her, “Can you find it in your heart to forgive him and go back to how it was before?”
She gulps as if there’s a lump in her throat, making it hard for her to swallow. She takes a deep inhale, and I know what she’s doing.
I used to drink to numb myself, but now she has learned to do it without alcohol. I observe as she holds back her emotions and waits. She waits for that familiar numbness that I am all too familiar with. Finally, she exhales and proudly declares that she has discovered a method of shutting down her emotions. She tells me she has become numb. However, I find it more poignant and sorrowful than something to be proud of.
“What’s to forgive? I am a member of the imperial harem, and the emperor is husband to eighty-four women. This was, in reality, my fault for expecting anything. I now know better. I paid dearly, but it was a profound lesson learned.” She replies.
“Are you going to ask him for a divorce?” I ask her hesitantly, and she chuckles softly at me and my question, telling me how childish I sound.
Her way of speaking is devoid of emotion. “I asked the emperor to depose me because I’m tired of this life, and I thought being a blind empress was impossible. But you and I both know what happens to deposed empress’s children. They do not fare well in life. Many become hated and victimized by their very siblings, even their father’s, over time.”
Her slender frame slumps as if a weight has suddenly descended upon her shoulders. She seems crushed by an invisible, oppressive presence, causing her breath to shudder.
“Jinghua,” She whispers, but her voice does not waver, “I realized I need to keep my position to protect our son Haoyu and them.”